Archive for August, 2007

Shaolin vs. Ninja! The Pride of a Nation Rests on the Outcome

Aug 31, 2007 in Humor, Current Events

t16106sy58r.jpgReuters reported today that a lawyer for the Shaolin Temple in China demanded an apology from an internet message board poster who claimed that a Japanese ninja once defeated several Shaolin monks in unarmed combat.

“The Internet user, calling themselves “Five Minutes Every Day”, said on an online forum last week that a Japanese ninja came to Shaolin, asked for a fight and many monks failed to beat him, the newspaper said.

“The facts that the monks could not defeat a Japanese ninja showed that they were named as kung fu masters in vain,” the Internet user was quoted as saying in the post.”

The Beijing News said, “The so-called defeat is purely fabricated, and we demand the Internet user to apologise to the whole nation for the wrongs he or she did,” while the Shaolin Temple “’strongly condemned the horrible deeds’ of the user.”

Lets step back here for a minute. The entire nation of China is demanding an apology from some kook on an internet message board who said that ninja could defeat Shaolin. You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.

I won’t speculate on how a ninja/shaolin battle would turn out (except to say that it would be fucking awesome), but China seriously needs to grow a pair. For the most populous nation in the world — and the second largest economy in Asia — to be so sensitive about a message board comment demonstrates a lack of cojones. And it’s not just the Japanese. Mention Taiwan and the Chinese will turn red (no pun intended).

On second thought, a ninja would totally kick a Shaolin monk’s ass. Until next time, when the Chinese gov’t demands an apology from In My Room, and I create an international diplomatic incident by laughing at them…