Cheerleader Ninjas

Saturday, April 24th, 2004 @ 12:15 am | Film

So I was at Blockbuster one night about a week ago, and a quirky film in the new releases section caught my eye. Cheerleader Ninjas was obviously a cheesy film, but after reading the back of the box, I knew it was one of those movies that was so bad, it had to be good.

And I wasn’t disappointed. Cheerleader Ninjas is a hilarious (-ly bad) send-up of ’80s teen sex romps, updated for the Internet age. A group called the “Catholic mothers with too much time on their hands” is on a mission to wipe out the smut-filled Internet. They decide to strike against that All-American symbol of young, nubile female sexuality: the cheerleader.

The Catholic mothers recruit Stephen, a gay Catholic reform school teacher who was once rejected from the cheerleading squad. Stephen leads a group of bad ass reform school girls in his fight against the Happy Valley High cheerleaders. The cheerleaders are forced to team up with their social opposites, the Star Trek loving geeks. They acquire ninja skills from a kung fu master, and with the help of the geeks they fight the reform school girls and the mysterious Mr. X, who is taking over the Internet with his zombie control virus.

From the first frame, it’s obvious that Cheerleader Ninjas is a work of parody that doesn’t take itself (or it’s characters) too seriously. This digitally-filmed, low-budget flick has possibly the smallest special-effects budget ever (the cost of costume rentals, a sex doll, two double-headed dildos, ninja weapons, and some props). Stunts are poorly executed, and a blow-up sex doll is frequently substituted as a stunt double.

Chock full of plot holes (and twists), gratuitous nudity, and way too many fart jokes, Cheerleader Ninjas is another quality entry into the bad film canon. The first time I watched it, I thought it was the funniest movie I’ve seen in a long while. After the second viewing, I realized how dumb it really was. If you’re in the mood for a really funny bad film, pick up Cheerleader Ninjas the next time you’re at Blockbuster.

Comments are closed.